One night I was discussing issues of recovery from the trauma of sexual abuse in childhood
when it occurred to me
If one is traumatised then one needs to be detraumatised.
These days it's referred to as trauma release.
Whilst I originally wrote this site as an adult survivor of child sexual abuse,
it is hoped that these pages contain transferrable concepts useful for survivors of other forms of trauma.
- release for returned soldiers from the trauma of war
- release from the trauma of a car collision
- release from the trauma of a workplace accident
- release from domestic violance
- release from emotional abuse
- release from any traumatic event.
It is estimated that between 1 in 6 men and 25% of woman have been sexually abused before the age of 16.
and yet recovery from csa (Child Sexual Abuse) is a very under resourced
and often poorly understood.
in Australia ( due to complete it's work this year)
It is estimated that 3% of men are sexually assaulted or abused during adult years (asa)
and yet asa recovery is even more under resourced
and the prevelance of msa ( the sexual abuse of males) under recognised.
Most families, schools, friends, workplaces, community organisations and Churches
may have Child Protection Policies but very few understand sexual trauma
and have little idea how to respond, how to care for a survivor of csa in recovery,
Workplaces in Australia are supposed to be free from sexual abuse or sexual harassment
but disclosure is often met with a lack of resolve or not knowing what to do.
apart from expensive private counsellors there is a lack of resources for asa survivors.
this needs to be addressed.
As one of the major impacts of csa and asa is trauma and the need to both correctly respond to a survivor in trauma, and for survivors to understand trauma - how it protects, how it can be permantely active
until de activated. I decided to name the site detraumatisation.
This homepage is a gateway site to resources.
As I have been talking to other men I found that not only csa,
but grief can hold us "back there" in unresolved events
and or the trauma of it.
Trauma and Grief.
I have found over and over again.
talking to men that when I tell my story or surviving csa (Child Sexual Abuse)
that the response it is often a disclosure of grief.
Grief at the catestrophic loss of a: father or mother, brother or sister or wife.
and so I began to ask - what is the common factor in csa and grief ?
What holds some survivors "back there?"
- Trauma - hence the site name of detraumatisation.
- Lack of support at the time or since
- parental and community response inadequate
- grief and a sence of loss
- not being understood
- a neeed to be comforted
Fatherlessness or In effect Fatherlessness.
Two World Wars in the first half of the twentieth centurary left many widows and fatherless sons. Some lost uncles,grandfathers or brothers in the wars.
Some found their fathers returned home, but in trauma.
They were there but not there. They too lost mates, fathers, brothers,
uncles or sons.
In the late twentieth centuary divorces increased, there were single parent families - sons without fathers.
Then thee are sons who biologicaly have a father who is alive,
but not there for his son.
There are fathers who abuse their sons or are complicit in others abusing their sons. These men are in effect fatherless.
as are sons who are criticised, ridiculed or unprotected by their fathers. They are often in various stags of trauma,
including the family secret of undisclosed csa.
In this context I understand why Jesus once said to follow Him
"you have to hate your father, mother .."
some sons will be controlled, held back, sabotaged
so long as there is a link with their abusive or controlling parents.
Only Jesus Christ can be the Lord of true Sons.
Godly father release and empower our sons.
Detraumatisation for the military
surviving the traumas of war.
It is now 2017 and a lot has happened since first writing my sites.
I have learnt a lot talking with other survivors with view very different to mine.
Please feel free to email me with comments, questions or criticisms.